Everyone gives off nonverbal vibes to other people, for some it can be worst. Before we talk to someone we try to sense how they are by the way they look. We judge them based on the way they talk to people. If they have a high vocabulary we normally think they are an educated person, who more than likely is successful. We also judge people based on how they dress. You can tell a lot about a person by what they wear. Normally you can see what kind of culture they are based on how they dress, but sometimes this is not accurate. If we see someone with baggy clothing we think they are a gangster, but sometimes this is not always true. They could just like the style of clothing. If we see a plaid tee shirt and ripped holey jeans they are a redneck, once again it could be false. There are a lot of ways to judge a person before you actually talk to them, even though some of these can have false predictions.
People always get different vibes from me. I am a very quiet and shy person, but most people don’t get that first impression when looking at me. They look at the way I dress, which some may say “rich white girl” by the way which is not true. They realize I don’t talk too much, so they think I am a stuck up white girl. Whenever I ask people, what they thought of me, that’s always what they say. They think because I am quiet that I think I’m better than everyone else. Then when they realize I’m an athlete, they even think that even more. Most people think athletes are people who are stuck up and almost judgmental. I met my friend who told me she thought I wouldn’t like her because she didn’t play sports and wasn’t in shape, but this is not the case. They sometimes even think by the way my facial expressions are that I’m a “bitch”. I ask them why they think that, and they just say I seem like I am better than everyone else. I think it’s incredible that these people have these first impressions and they are all wrong.
I go back and ask them, so am I really what you thought I was? They answer quickly telling me “no way, you are so nice!” It’s amazing what kind of vibe we can give off to people by our clothing and facial expressions. It tells you most of the time we are wrong about each other. They thought because I was an athlete and quiet that I’m stuck up, when simply I am just shy. I am the type of person who is nervous to start a conversation, but I am slowly trying to break out of my shell. Just remember when you are getting vibes from other people, give them the benefit of the doubt and have a conversation. You never know who your next friend can be.
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ReplyDeleteSame thing with me!
ReplyDeleteI try to explain to people why I may look like a snob because I don't say hi or anything. I use to wave and say hi to someone I knew, but when they don't see or hear me, I felt stupid and embarrassed. So, to prevent that icky feeling, I just pretend I didn't see them then turn my head around and just wait for them to greet me. I don't mean to look like a snob. I really don't.
There's this other time when I was waiting for my ride and it was really sunny outside. These two guys walked passed by me, and I just looked at them because they were having an interesting conversation. They were talking so loud so they caught my attention. All of a sudden one of the guys yelled at me saying, “Dang girl don't stare at me like that! I didn't do nothin'!” I was so confused at first, not knowing if he was talking to me or not. When I realized that it was me that he was talking to, I was like “What the heck?”. Obviously there was a misunderstanding. I was not looking at him in a negative way, I was squinting because it was so freakin' bright outside and I just happened to stare at them because they were so loud. I didn't say anything back to him. I just looked away. I hope I didn't look like a “bitch” or anything (lol).
I can understand how people think athletes are stuck up because of the way the present themselves. Many walk around with a kind of strut, like they are saying, “Look at me. I’m a bad- ass basketball (insert any sport here) player.” It puts me off and I am an athlete. In my hay day, however, I could walk around smiling at everyone and they didn’t think I was weird or that I was trying to pick someone up.
ReplyDeleteEven though I was very athletic, my best friends in high school weren’t. I liked it that way. I could separate my court life from everyday life. Conversations were fresh each day. I was also a cheerleader for one horrible year (I hated every minute of it except when I was supporting the track team or cross country runners) and learned how ridiculously high most football players thought of themselves. I always dated cross country runners. They seemed to have something more between the ears and had way better looking legs.
I enjoy dressing up sometimes but for the most part I like jeans that fit loose, sweats (I can wear them year round), and a roomy top. If this makes other people think I don’t care about myself and how I look outwardly, they are right on the latter. I see people wearing crosses but that doesn’t make them any more special than those who don’t but still live by their God’s word. It’s what is inside that matters the most.
First impressions are not mental conversations between two or more individuals. It is an initial visual reaction we get from visual stimuli we are presented with. We are all told not to judge a book by its cover and to be accepting of others but our society hasn't evolved enough to allow us to do this. I see many beautiful females around campus who wear expensive designer clothes and I get the feeling that they are somewhat snobby but then a second after that thought passes I realize they might just love the clothes and not care if it was Gucci or Armani who designed it. The clothes don't make the individual, but they do make the individual feel so damn good about their appearance and how other's perceive them. We want others to look at us and say man that looks hot. At least that is why I buy clothes that look good, I figure I feel a little more confident when I walk around.
ReplyDeleteAs for the topic of athletes... People, it is called swag. Swagger, confidence, it is the athletes mojo, so to speak. If they lose it they don't got game anymore. It's that x factor that kicks in for you in the last minutes of the game. You can get punched in the mouth but it is what helps you get back up again. It takes a while to establish it, but it feels great once you can harness it. Now there is a fine line between arrogance and having swag but some people confuse the two and that is where many miscommunications happen.